I was fast asleep when I heard very loud banging at our front door. It was around 2:30 a.m. I looked out the window and saw a large number of Israeli soldiers and military vehicles around our house. 

 

Then I heard my brother-in-law, who lives next door, telling us to open the front door. The banging did not stop and my two sons went downstairs to open the door. About 20 soldiers rushed into our house as if they were on a battle field; most of them were masked and looked terrifying. 

 

The commander ordered all of us to gather in the living room; my five children aged 5 to 19 years, my husband and myself. Then he asked to see our identity cards. When I asked him why he was in my home in the middle of the night he told me he wanted to arrest our 17-year-old son. When I asked him why, he told me he was obeying orders. I told the commander my son did not do anything wrong but he pretended not to hear me.

 

The commander then turned to our 17-year-old son and told him to say goodbye to us. I gave my son a hug and told him not to be scared and to take care of himself. My heart sank because I had a feeling they were taking him for a long time. I was trembling out of fear and tried to look strong in front of my family but I did not succeed. I felt totally helpless and scared. Then they took our son away without giving us any documents. 

 

By this time the whole neighbourhood was awake and young men started to throw stones at the soldiers. The military vehicles drove away into the darkness and I felt I had just buried my son. There was darkness and emptiness all around me which lasted for months. Whatever I did and wherever I went I was haunted by the fact that my son was not home with me.

 

Although this was not the first time that my home was raided by the military, this time it left a deep impact on me. My sleep is now shallow and I wake up exhausted. I wake up many times during the night and I look out the window and look for soldiers. I still find it hard to go back to sleep even when I don’t see soldiers around the house. My family and I live in constant fear.